DDP - A Point Of Clarification

First, thank you all so much for your amazing words, encouragements, prayers, etc. It's breathtaking and comforting to know that, even online, their is a community of faith, family and friends who hope and pray the best for me, my wife, our son and our lives.

I have received a number of great comments here on the blog as well as emails, text messages and even some personal calls from many of you who have offered counsel, wisdom, advice, prayer and even just an open ear. I am grateful for all of you.

I also want to thank you for allowing me to be so open and transparent with you. Some have thanked me for putting in words what they have been feeling while others have told me they felt I shared too much. Yet, I think it is necessary that we live transparently before each other, and I will continue to strive to do just that. I began this blog as an effort to get my open and honest thoughts out there to share with you, and I appreciate you allowing me the ability to do that.

(side note: this is not therapy for me to write these things for you. In fact, it is painful and somewhat embarrassing. So I am not exposing myself in an effort to gain some sort of twisted self-absolution. I am simply striving to be honest with you on all of my thoughts.)

That said, not every thought is pretty. Not every thought is well-written. Not every thought is easy to read, and some are downright disturbing.

Nonetheless, I will continue to strive to be as open and honest as I can, always encouraging dialogue with you with no walls or barriers between us. Speak your mind here, and I will speak mine. Together, we will strive for unity. Not unity of ideas, nor unity of philosophies on every subject. I wouldn't want that. Neither you nor I should be parrots of one another. No.

Rather, we will strive for unity of Spirit in perfect love. Here, at this place/this blog, we will not fear what is said because --- as a wise Word once written says, "Perfect Love casts out all fear."
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Second, I would like to clarify my particular DDP "crisis", if you will.

This DDP is not a crisis of faith.

Far from it! Indeed, my faith is more resolute than ever that God is unwavering in His passionate pursuit of me.

Rather, this DDP is a crisis of self.

My DDP is a place to which I must occasionally journey in order to find solace and re-energize myself to face the world again. Not to make a joke but consider, if you would, that my DDP is much like Superman's Fortress Of Solitude. (Cue the head-shaking) This is the place I go to get away and recharge.

However, this time, the cave has been darker.
The shadows, looming. The journey, longer. The depths, deeper.

Through some prayer and introspection time this week, I have had a series of thoughts, dreams and/or visions.

I believe that my DDP exit journey has begun, and I am working it out. The "visions", if you will, have come in sequence; and amazingly they are ending at cliffhanger points.

Please stick with me through these next several blog entries while I work out these thoughts and please indulge me to take a little more blog time on my DDP journey. Happy days will be here again.

These next several blog entries will be where each of the "visions" have ended, so that you can see where the journey is taking me. I will warn you: I am not out of it yet.

Also, I want to say that none of these pictures have been pre-meditated or pre-conceived by me, nor do I know how any of this will resolve. The journey segments you read on this blog is what I'm getting at the same time. I will do my best to use my words to paint as vivid a picture as I'm seeing for you.

Thank you again for your thoughts, prayers and support. You are all so dear to me!